The Museum of Extraordinary Things

by Alice Hoffman
Nov 24-Dec28, 2014

I finished reading this book a week ago, and unlike a really great book you can't stop thinking about, I haven't given this one another thought. Historical fiction can not only be educational, but also entertaining – within the right context. This story is sandwiched in between two horrific fires: the Triangle Shirtwaist Factory fire and the Dreamland fire. These unimaginable tragedies do not make for an entertaining read, especially when the author adds in a deplorable father whose inhuman acts would disturb and trouble even the most stoic reader.

With New York City at the turn of the last century as one of the other main "characters," I felt that more focus was placed upon it than the actual people and their unconvincing, evolving love story. In other words, I feel there was just too much crammed into one book. There were times when I would be completely engrossed and read page after page. But more times than not, I would drift off and have no comprehension of what I just read. Really great potential, but never fully realized.

My favorite parts we those of Maureen, the "faithful" servant and nanny, and her secret love affair with the Wolfman. More focus should have been placed on them, than on Coralie and Eddie. Why does it always seem that historical fiction needs to have a love-at-first-sight plot? Include a bunch of convenient resolutions, and it's one cliche after another. I'm not sure I've ever read a Hoffman novel before, but for some reason her name stands out in my mind. Unfortunately now it's not for a good reason.

Oh well, on to better books. Happy 2015!

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Never Knowing

by Chevy Stevens
May-July 2014

I really struggled through this one. Immediately, I was turned off by the narrator's voice; it was so affected and forced. Kind of like a bad acting job, but in her defense, she didn't exactly have exciting or intelligent dialogue to work with. The only reason I felt the need to stick it out was because of how much I enjoyed Still Missing.

The main character, Sara, was quite possibly the most annoying protagonist I've read in a long time. Whiny, selfish and just an overall pain in the ass, I would actually find myself clicking my tongue while listening to her antics. Her relationship with her fiancé felt forced. Her attitude with the police was completely obnoxious. None of her relationships were the least bit genuine.

In the same style as Still Missing, Sara is speaking to a voiceless therapist in each chapter. I guess this is Stevens' "thing?" Just because it was successful once does not mean it should be reused. This time it came across as obvious and trite.

The twist at the end was not only expected, but also proved to have no real bearing on the story. It was thrown in as an afterthought. Since I paid money for this audiobook I hung on until the end, torturous as it was. It's funny, I was reading some other reader reviews and it seems it's either a love it or hate it book. The complaints I read were exactly like my own. With so many books out there, I think I need to stop being loyal to random authors. It's one thing to read several titles by an author I consider a favorite, but just because I discover a great new book doesn't mean I need to read an author's complete repertoire. Enough of that.

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Help for the Haunted

by John Searles
October 28-Nov19, 2013

What a waste of three precious weeks of reading time. I can't remember now what made me want to read this book, but it had to be something significant because this genre is never chosen by me. I'm just not a fan of mystery or suspense. And while I think a book can accomplish way more than a movie can, I found myself thinking that this book will be way scarier if (when) it gets made into a movie.

Since I'm not going to recommend Help for the Haunted to any of my book friends, spoilers will abound in this review. Please keep reading though because I'm telling you it's not worth your time anyway.

The whole time I was reading, I felt as though I stepped into the middle of the conversation. It's not like when chapters leave you hanging in suspense, but more like I wasn't in on the secret, which was incredibly frustrating. I just never found my stride. The gist of this book is that Sylvie and her sister Rose are left orphaned after their parents are murdered. Sylvester and Rose Mason have the unusual, but highly publicized career of helping those who have been haunted in one way or another. Sylvie has been coerced by her evil, cruel sister to give the police a story which leads them away from Rose being the prime suspect, but Sylvie can't help but think that there is another side to the story. From here the book drags and drags, weaving from present to past and throwing in a handful of stories meant to throw the reader off. I found myself bored, but not really giving up because I had to find out who the murderer was. And if I'm being honest, Searles writing style is easy to read. But the creepy stuff and learning more about the Mason's "healing" work didn't seem to accomplish its task ... to scare me, the reader. There's a doll at the crux of the story that had ill-effects on its owner until the Masons came and removed it. The doll then proceeded to bring chaos and sickness to Sylvie's mom, until they locked it away in a rabbit cage in the basement. This is where I think visuals would be more successful.

I could continue to ramble on, but I made my point about the scattered story line. Still, I pressed on, sure that the payoff would be worth it. And then, AND THEN, it turns out the Masons were fakes!!!! No one or nothing was haunted and they healed no one!! Seriously?! The father just drugged people making them believe they were being possessed. All in the name of publicity!! There's even an undercurrent of homophobia and intolerance connected to Rose. What a giant waste of time!!!! If I'm going to pick up a book that promises suspense, mystery and the supernatural, WHY do I want it to turn out to be a hoax after all?? Waste. There's three weeks I will never get back. Lesson learned.

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The Dinner

by Herman Koch
July 14 til I gave up

Yuck. Lost in translation? Maybe. Completely scattered and uninteresting? Totally. I tried, but was convinced to give it up when Orange is the New Black arrived from Amazon (completely obsessed. more on that later).

The whole premise is about a man, his wife and son, and his brother's family. The events are supposed to take place during a dinner, but the story jumps from dinner to past events and is all over the board. When I first started Dinner and learned it was translated from Dutch, I decided maybe it was hard to get into because of the differences in cultures. That maybe it would be worth hanging on for some great payoff at the end. But when I was literally finding other things to do before bed to avoid reading, I knew it was time to throw in the towel.

So many books, so little time. Don't bother.

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The Sunshine When She's Gone

by Thea Goodman
April 24-May 1, 2013

My speedy reading streak continues. I polished off this one in a week. Can't remember the last time I did that, but to be fair, Sunshine was only 225 pages. I also had that Bill Withers song stuck in my head for the past week. Only this book is the exact opposite ... there was Sunshine When She's Gone. Withers sings about how sad and lonely he is without his love, but in this case, Veronica finds herself more than happy when her husband and daughter leave her for the weekend.

Suffering from severe post-partum depression and loss over the emergency hysterectomy that followed the birth, Veronica is surprised to wake up refreshed after an unexpected good night's sleep. Her husband John wakes up early and decides to take six-month old Clara out in the cold January morning to a diner for breakfast. When he finds the diner closed, he hops in a cab for the airport and onto a flight to Barbados. He just wants to get warm. What follows is two days of phone tag, lies and Veronica's unexpected pleasure at having some alone time. For the reader, it's nothing but tension and worry that the baby will get home safely before getting any sicker than she already is.

I kept waiting for the plot to come to a point, but the storyline was so contrived, and the author appeared to give up at the end. I mean, really, who randomly decides to go to the Caribbean, and in what world would he have even gotten through customs with no luggage and a ticket purchased the same day?? I know that I read novels to escape reality, but they need to be somewhat believable too. The book was short, and in the end I'm grateful for that, but another 50 pages could have helped explain these unsympathetic characters a little more. Although maybe that was Goodman's intentions; to leave the reader feeling as shallow as this couple.

I really want to give this book two stars, but I have to give credit to the author for her beautiful prose. A reluctant three stars it is.

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Witches of East End

by Melissa de la Cruz December 10, 2012-January 6, 2013 "... I began to think that perhaps the toxin of Ragnarok had been found in our world, which could only mean one thing. Loki had escaped from his chains and had come to unleash his vengeance upon us." In other words, too cheesy for me. This one's going to be short and sweet. This book really had potential. Witches? Love 'em. Vampires? Ditto. Zombies? Not so much. The premise was right up my alley: three centuries-old witches forbidden to practice magic. When their sleepy town of North Hampton becomes the home of several unexplained mysteries, it's time to dust off those wands and get back to it. But for me, Witches bordered a little too much on the sci-fi. And let me tell you, the Beauchamp family doesn't hold a candle to Matthew & Diana. The romance was there, but not in the brilliant way it was penned by Deborah Harkness. The magic was there, but it became tainted with demons and zombies. The first in a trilogy, Witches of East End finishes with a decent cliffhanger. But, although it was a quick read, I don't care enough to pick up the remaining two. And the book slump continues... * * * * *

The Casual Vacancy

by J.K. Rowling

October 18-December 9, 2012

By page two, Barry Fairbrother is dead. By page twenty-two, I was completely lost in the British vernacular. By about page 102, I realized I was no longer in the world of Harry Potter, or anything YA, for that matter. The f-bomb was abundant and the subject matter was pretty intense.

I was quite excited to open this book, a birthday gift from Joanna, and eager to jump in. When I posted this fact to Facebook, I started getting comments about this book being "pornographic" compared to the world of wizardry. I hadn't heard that? And of course, since I was still traumatized from the garbage that was and still is 50 Shades, I really wasn't sure what to expect.

Unfortunately, I had several issues with Vacancy. First, as mentioned earlier, was the British themes. Call me ignorant, but I had a very hard time understanding not only the slang, but also the social hierarchies and classes. To me, parish council is a group of leaders at church. Here, it's local government. Once I adapted, it flowed easier, but then I was beginning to feel indifferent.

Second, the characters. Oh, the characters. Would new ones ever stop being introduced? Would any of them be even remotely likable? (I'm going with "no" on that point.) In the beginning, they were added so fast and furiously that I completely missed one, and it wasn't until a few pages from the end that I figured out who the hell Maureen was. And by then, I had lost interest.

Third, the issues. Rowling covers pretty much every issue known to man. Child abuse (VERY difficult to read about, in my opinion), rape (of a teenager, no less!), cutting, child neglect, drug use (from marijuana to heroine), and domestic violence. The troubles continue at such a rapid pace that by the end, two unfortunate children are dead. We've plummeted into situations that are nearly impossible to read about.

Finally, the "vacancy" itself. While I know that the death of Barry and the subsequent vacancy of his parish council seat was just a vehicle to delve further into the lives of these selfish, flawed characters, I just didn't care. I think mainly because we were so inundated with political ads this year, but I really wasn't riveted by Pagford's local government.

I'm sad to say that The Casual Vacancy left me feeling emotionally vacant, and honestly, very glad to be finished with it. This string of bad books had gone on entirely too long.


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50 Shades of ... I don't really care

by E.L. James
May 29 - July 16, 2012

Thank God that's over. I am probably the only woman on the planet who didn't read this trilogy in a week, let alone twice in a row. I didn't jump on the Christian Grey train; rather I wanted to shove him in front of one. I suppose I can understand why everyone is so fascinated with the books. I mean, let's face it, I read a lot and I have never read sex scenes quite like these. But after the initial "shock" and once through the first book, it was old news and honestly a little boring. If I hadn't bought the complete trilogy on my Kindle at one time, I highly doubt I would have continued on to book two, and definitely not book three.

I find it unnecessary to do a complete recap, so this post will be strictly opinion with lots of spoilers. I don't suggest reading any further unless you've already finished the books. If you have, I'd love to hear what drew you to them (or not).

I was immediately turned off by the poor prose. By no means am I a literary giant, but I've read enough to know good writing from bad. And even if I can't articulate which it may be, trust me, I just know. Within the first 10% of the book I was already rolling my eyes at the way the author overused "he/she mutters" and 'he/she murmurs." Really, why is this a story of two people with mush mouths who whisper to each other all the time? And if Christian Grey is the strong dominant the author portrays, then I'm quite sure he would never murmur anything. This was my biggest pet peeve. Incidentally, I did a find for "murmur" on my Kindle, and I came up with 764 results. Buy a thesaurus, Ms. James.

The next thing that kept my eyes rolling (and no, I don't want to be "punished" for doing so; that was just absurd) was Ana's constant referral to her inner goddess and her subconscious. It got to the point where I thought she was a schizophrenic with all these personalities living inside of her. When her subconscious started wearing half-moon glasses and reading Charles Dickens, it went completely over the top into utter ridiculousness. In reality, a 21-year old girl could simply not be emotionally mature enough to recognize any of this. Remember what you were interested in at 21 and fresh out of college? Yeah, me too, and it wasn't my freaking subconscious.

Toward the end of the second book, I was just becoming bored by so many things. First, the fact that Ana was so in love with Christian, yet she constantly walked on eggshells around him. She always worried whether or not he was mad at her. So very NOT sexy. Second, his possessiveness. If he murmured one more time, "you're mine" I was going to puke. Flawed or not, get a grip buddy. Third, I honestly failed to see the attraction to a man who takes pleasure in inflicting pain on a woman. In my opinion, he was a half step away from all-out domestic abuse. At one point he even says: "I want to punish you. Really beat the shit out of you." WAKE UP ladies!! THIS IS NOT OK! I would have thrown the book at the wall, but my Kindle didn't deserve to be smashed into a million pieces.

Finally, the little mystery thrown in for good(?) measure. By that point, I didn't care about Jack Whateverhisnameis or why he was out to get the Greys. It seemed an afterthought to add this inane storyline, and I don't think it added any intrigue or compassion at all.

I could probably go on for another 500 words or more, but I think you get my disgust loud and clear. I. Just. Don't. Get. It. But if you loved it, please, oh please, tell me why. Was it the sex? If so, I have to believe there are better-written smut books out there. Was it the love story? Because I don't understand loving a controlling, insecure masochist.

Talk to me.

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An Unexamined Life

by Gareth Young
Oct 16-Nov 14, 2011

Recently, I learned about a pretty cool concept called Book Rooster. It's essentially an online community of passionate readers who receive free kindle editions of books by indie authors and write reviews. It's a great way for these sometimes struggling authors to get more reviews posted on Amazon.com. All you have to do is sign up and indicate which genres of books you are interesting in, and Book Rooster will start sending you titles. If you aren't interested in a particular book, all you have to do is wait for the next one to come along. Reading and reviewing with no pressure! My kind of site for sure. A more simplified version of the follow review is posted on Amazon, thanks to the free digital copy I received from the Rooster. Check it out.

I must say that upon reading the brief synopsis on An Unexamined Life, my interest was piqued. Definitely not the kind of subject matter I read on a daily basis. So I downloaded my free sample and headed off to Jamaica where I was sure I was going to read at least two, if not three, books. Little did I realize that a cocktail in one hand, seated at the swim-up bar, does not bode well for a kindle. Reading just had to wait until I was home again.

Never before has a book sparked such raw emotion and anger in me. Some might say this is a sign of a truly brilliant author, and while that may be true, I certainly can't say that I'd ever again want to read another of Young's books (this is the author's second novel). Joe Kay is a man who is living the textbook life. On paper, he has everything; a high-paying job, a devoted wife, and most recently, a large inheritance from a dead aunt. When his career takes a nose dive, Joe finds he has more time to spend with his wife. Only now does he realize that years of career-first neglect has driven a large gap between the couple. Joe resorts to online "dating," spending late nights chatting with strange women and having cyber affairs. For whatever reason, Joe becomes braver and begins bringing these affairs to the light of day. He even begins a fantasy-driven affair with his next-door neighbor. At this point, I'm keeping up and fairly intrigued as to where the next pages will take me, but then the protagonist's flaws come screaming to life.

Joe frequents a coffee shop more than ever now that he has Liz, a high school student, to ogle. He quickly becomes infatuated from afar as he eavesdrops on her every word. He finally works up the nerve to speak to her and he is instantly a teenager again. The affair that ensues paints the picture of a weak, selfish, perverted pig. I found myself actually wanting to throw my kindle at a wall I was becoming so frustrated with Joe's weaknesses.

"Moral weakness wasn't indicative of a lack of love for my Eliza, unimaginably cherished, the light of my life. Surely she could see that as a man of means and charm, it was inevitable I would be exposed to irresistible temptation?"

Puke. Some would ask me why I didn't just put the book down for good, but at 263 short pages, I had to at least be assured that Joe's wife would get some kind of redemption. The final moments of Joe's story had me writhing with disgust and frustration. I finished the book wondering if perhaps An Unexamined Life is more suitable to a male reader? As a woman, I refuse to make a single excuse for Joe's adulterous behavior. As an avid reader, I can compliment the author on his prose, but with the hatred I feel for Joe Kay, I have read my first and last Gareth Young book.

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The 19th Wife

by David Ebershoff
Feb 9 - Mar 30, 2011

Well, that was more like homework than pleasurable reading. The first quarter of took me longer than reading all 507 pages put together. I mean who writes historical fiction with fictional footnotes?! How can a reader possibly flow through a book with ease when she has to stop to read fake citations, made-up Wikipedia entries and pretend newspaper clippings? I'll give the author credit for his ambition, but I guess I just don't get it.

Another case in point, in the acknowledgments section, Ebershoff writes, "This is a work of fiction. It is not meant to be read as a stand-in for a biography of Ann Eliza Young, Brigham Young, or any of the other historical figures who appear in it." Which leaves me with the question, why bother?! It took me nearly two months to read The 19th Wife. Two months of my (reading) life that I will never get back. And it's not like I learned anything. Yes, I know it's a work of fiction, and fiction is what I prefer to read, but historical fiction tends to have a bit more truth to it than this novel. I don't know, I'm just having trouble understanding the author's point. If I'm going to read about the history of the Firsts, I would hope I could learn a little something.

There were actually two stories being told simultaneously. The first is a fake book, entitled The 19th Wife, written by Ann Eliza Young. Ann Eliza was the supposed 19th wife of Brigham Young and wrote the book in an attempt to rid America of polygamy. (Near the end of the book, a footnote states that she was actually more like his 52nd wife?!) The second is a modern-day tale of a young gay man shunned from the Saints and his attempt to prove his mother's innocence. Jordan's mother, also a 19th wife, is accused of killing her husband. In my opinion, Ebershoff should have simply written a fiction novel revolving around these 20th century characters and called it a day. I wouldn't have been left wondering what the point was of the majority of the book. The modern "half" was much more interesting, but was not given nearly as much attention. Out of the 500 pages, I would guess that only 150 of those pages were dedicated to Jordan and his mother.

I'm on to much more lighthearted material. Can't say I would recommend this one.

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A Reliable Wife

by Robert Goolrick


Oh hi. Remember me? I thought maybe not. Honestly, I think about you often, my dear blog, and have been meaning to get back to you. Where has this year gone? Why have I been so busy? I'm not sure I can put my non-stop summer and fall into words that would make you understand why you've been neglected. But I'm back. No more excuses. I love to read and write about the books I've read. I'm ten posts behind. Today, this quiet, lovely Saturday, I vow to you to catch up on all of those reviews. I won't post them all at once, that would be silly. I'm thinking two a week for now. Maybe more. We'll see. But here goes...

Unfortunately, I resume my reviews with a crazy one. Ralph is a man who puts an ad in the newspaper for a "reliable wife." He feels he is unable to find a woman any other way, and in 1907, this may not be too unusual a method. Catherine responds to the ad and arrives by train to meet Ralph for the first time and marry him. So far it seems pretty interesting, right? Goolrick's writing style is quite smart and I was hooked from the beginning. But then the story turned dark and sinister and downright depressing. One of Ralph's greatest regrets in life is becoming estranged from his son. So he enlists his new wife to help find his son so that they can make amends. When Catherine finds the son, a series of unpredictable events begin to unfold and the book completely changes tone.

A Reliable Wife is:
1. Dark
2. Well-written
3. Depressing
4. Sinister

Ralph is:
1. Pathetic
2. Weak
3. Desperate

Catherine is:
1. Maniacal
2. Deceitful
3. Flawed

A Reliable Wife is not:
1. Typical
2. Comforting
3. Recommended by me

I think this quote from the last few pages of the book sums it up perfectly:

"It was a story of a son who felt his one true birthright was to kill his father. It was the story of a father who could not undo a single gesture of his life, no matter the sympathies of his heart. It was a story of poison, poison that causes you to weep in your sleep, that comes to you first as a taste of ecstasy. It was a story of people who don't choose life over death until it's too late to know the difference, people whose goodness is forgotten, left behind like a child's toy in a dusty playroom, people who see many things and remember only a handful of them and learn from even fewer, people who hurt themselves, who wreck their own lives and then go on to wreck the lives of those around them, who cannot be helped or assuaged by love or kindness or luck or charm, who forget kindness, the feeling and practice of it, and how it can save even the worst, most misshapen life from despair.

It was just a story about despair."

Decide for yourself.

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Shadow Tag

by Louise Erdrich

 Sometimes I think that if it weren't for Joanna, I wouldn't know what to read! She has given me so many great books over the years, but every once in a while she slips me a dud. When I got this one, I swear she told me it was a good book. Apparently I was dreaming. The premise is great: A woman battling alcoholism and a bit of an identity crisis is manipulating her painter husband so that he will finally give her the divorce she wants. She does this by writing a diary (that she knows he is reading) and making up lies in hopes that her husband will finally crack.

With this as the setting, Shadow Tag started out with gusto. I loved the manipulation of Gil by Irene in her diary. Gil was an abusive, selfish husband and father. He sort of deserved what he was getting. But then the author proceeds to lose me by intertwining Native American history into the plot. I admit, I completely missed the point here, but I still think this section could have been cut down by at least half. Irene was the subject of Gil's paintings, and Native Americans believe that art houses your soul ... contributing to Irene's struggle. Because of my ignorance to their history, this fact went over my head entirely.

But then Irene became a drunk. Pathetic and weak. And then I actually hated her as much as I hated Gil. When the end of the book was finally approaching, I thought there was no way the author was going to do what I thought she was going to do. And she did. By that point I hated everything about the book and couldn't believe I took the time to finish it. Apparently Joanna felt the same, but I didn't listen. So of course I asked her why she shared it with me in the first place? But isn't it true that sometimes you have to share the worst reads because you need someone else to confirm your feelings? If that was her goal, she succeeded.

Wow, I don't think I've been this harsh on a book since The Shack. Glad they don't come around too often! But I honestly couldn't recommend this one unless you're in the mood to be frustrated.

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The Shack

by William P Young

I know this book has gotten TONS of publicity and acclaim. And I know that when that happens I feel pressure to not only read it, but enjoy it too. I wish I could say I liked it, even a little bit. But unfortunately, I never got involved from the second I picked it up until I forced myself to finish it. I read a lot, so I shouldn't feel loyalty to a book just because of its exposure. But my dear friend gave it to me for my birthday and I hate to have to tell her what I thought of it. When a friend recommends a books to me, I am disappointed with myself when I don't like it the way she did.

In reading some reviews, I see that people call The Shack a "well-written page turner." For me that couldn't be further from the truth. At points I was actually laughing at how poorly written pieces were. And while I love my religion and wish I were better at it, this book was screamingly sacrilegious for me. I know that others were comforted by its message, but I have a really hard time reading a fiction novel about a man who gets invited to a shack by God. And that this God turns out to be a woman. I also felt that the description of Missy getting kidnapped was excruciating. Again, this is fiction, and I do not need to read such graphic detail of a child being abducted and finding her remains. Save that for real life; there's plenty of that on the news.

I don't feel that I really need to give a synopsis of the book here. Most people already know what it's about. And if it touched you, I am glad. I'm sorry that it didn't have an affect on me they way it did on my wonderful friend. Maybe a discussion with her will help me appreciate it a little more. As you can see, I really struggle when I dislike something so much.


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